I really hate to say, “I told you so.” I really do. I’m a modest guy that doesn’t like to gloat.
But I must, on this special occasion, take the time to do the worm on some clowns and follow it up with a big ol’ robot on your faces for good measure.
In order to understand my need to gloat, let’s take a trip down memory lane.
*Wayne’s World flashback dance*
In October 2008, I wrote that the Kimbo Slice phenomenon was essentially over after his 14-second loss to a no-named fighter on national television. MMA “experts” came out of the woodwork to tell me that I knew nothing about what I was talking about. Instead of folding with KImbo-like frailty, I stood my ground.
Since then, Kimbo’s fame has all but fizzled. Last night was his chance to shine and come back to national prominence.
That worked out well, right?
Kimbo, after a series of impressive takedowns at the beginning of the fight, Kimbo got winded and lost all momentum. His opponent, Matt Mitrione, then began to dissect Kimbo with vicious kicks to the leg. Finally, the toughest man in the world just lay down like a fish out of water, covering up while Mitrione pounded away. It was nothing short of embarrassing.
To top off the humiliation, UFC president, Dana White, was so disgusted by the performance that he dropped Kimbo from UFC. This goes to show that sometimes Youtube fame doesn’t quite translate to success, well, anywhere else. Right, Murda Mook?
While I hate to see Slice face such a terrible fate, I can succumb to my pettiness and need to always be right an give one big wagging middle finger to my good friends in the comments section over at “Say It Ain’t So, Kimbo” Part 1.
*Does the Robot*
*Moonwalks*
And that concludes the most masturbatory post in TSS history. I’m going to make my momma a sammich.
Not since the great stock market crash of, well, last week, have I seen so many people lose so much money so fast. CBS, EliteXC and Kimbo Slice are now scratching their heads, wondering how to recover now that their cash cow has been processed into dollar menu burgers. In case you missed, here’s the backstory:
Kimbo Slice became a huge celebrity on Youtube by whoopin ass. Over the course of a few months, he went from being homeless to beating the holy fire out of guys to the delight of millions of internet fans. Eventually he got signed to EliteXC’s brand of mixed martial arts fighting. With this mainstream star in tow, EliteXC nabbed a deal with CBS, giving them the largest audience for an MMA fight. Everything rested on Slice’s shoulders. He was the star that would take his insane ability to punch someone’s head off and take mixed martial arts into everyone’s households.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
