“Obsession” By The L. Photos By Dan Lippitt

Not many of us need anything for Christmas, and the things we want most in life tend to be metaphorical, proverbial and visceral. I’m sure most of you handsome gents would be contented this forthcoming cold winter’s night with a blow job and a smile from the wife. So that is what L and I want to give you this holiday; we want to open that door of opportunity for you by sorting out the best pheromone inducers of the season.

If you aren’t yet privy, the lovely L and I are roommates. In true girly fashion, we have dissected all things Woman, including but not limited to shoes, make-up and perfume. What we have discovered in our trials of the latter is no matter how pretty we think a perfume smells, men have very different senses. In all, we’ve concluded the more we smell like baked goods, the more men want to eat us. Turns out the way to a man’s heart really is through his stomach (Ladies: think vanilla, sugar, cookies, etc.)

Let’s get back to you, good sirs. L and I have turned our focus to cologne in the great pursuit of making all men smell like “he will be mine, oh yes, he will be mine.” A simple sniff that can make a girl close her eyes and sigh. We’re going to pit these eight man-scents — the classics and the newbies — against one another until we have a superior spray. We’ll get your old girl’s olfactory working, her wheelhouse turning, and her inhibitions lowering. Consider it the gift that keeps on giving.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, TSS fellows.

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