The biggest question remaining from the Jay-Solange fight video is why the hell was Blue's crazy auntie throwing bows and kicks in the first place. And while the involved parties have remained mum, that hasn't slowed media outlets from coming up with their own reasons why, based on on information from their "unnamed sources."
I figure if they can play make-believe, we can do a bit of the same so we're going to rank each outlet's version of the events from five Jigga laughs being the most absurd down to one laughing Hov if the version of the events sound slightly believable.
Per Daily Mail, her brother-in-law keeps promising to boost his new sister's career but won't.
"...A family friend today revealed the simmering tensions that has led to the family feud, saying: 'He hasn’t kept his promise to help her. Jay keeps telling her to give him some time and he will sit down and write with her and then get her into the studio but he hasn't done it yet.'
"The source added: 'Solange's album is coming out soon but there is no buzz about it, which is a bad sign within the industry.
"'Solange wants a major career like her sister and she's tired of living in her shadow. She's jealous.
"'Jay-Z promised he would help take her to the next level but he never found the time to keep his word.'"
Response: Hmm...Solange frustrated by living in Bey's shadow sounds plausible but she's done that her whole life. No need to get pissed off at 27. The only catch here is the notion that Jay reneged on his word at some point, which doesn't sound totally out of character. However, Solange would have to get in line behind all of State Property to fight him just for that though.
Correction: The correct word is reneged. Mark that down because I won't make any more mistakes in this lifetime.
Per New York Daily News, the brouhaha was because Solange was drunk and nosy, becoming upset that Jay wanted to keep partying/make an appearance at Rihanna's afterparty without Beyonce. Oh yeah, she was also heated because her friends couldn't get into the party.
"They wouldn't leave and kept name dropping Jay Z. They were pretending they were guests of his and not hers. Management went to Julius (Beyonce's bodyguard) and said there's a problem."
"Our source said Jay Z soon got wind of it and snapped at Solange, saying “don't use my name.”
"She seemed drunk and irritated," said a second source. "She said, ‘Why can't you go home?' and to Beyonce 'Why does your husband need to go to the club right now?'"
Response: Tins mentioned that alcohol could be a key factor and I alluded to it as well. This is one that falls on Solange moreso than Hova, but we're using Hova's face for the ratings, so...yeah. No laughing here because this could be plausible.
Hollywood Life insinuates it's because Solange left Jay Z's Roc Nation to branch out on her own.
"Jay Z and Solange Knowles...also have (or had) a business relationship. And with Solange branching out on her own and ditching Jay’s label, Roc Nation, there’s a good chance the schism is directly related...
"Solange’s DJing career was being managed by Roc Nation’s Rich Kleiman since at least 2011, when the singer followed Beyonce’s lead and let her father, Mathew Knowles, go as her manager.
"...(L)ooking on Roc Nation’s website today, a day after video of Solange assaulting Jay Z in an elevator was released, her name is no longer listed. Since it was never publicized when Solange left the company, some, including MediaTakeout, are speculating that Jay Z only recently dropped her, ending their business relationship in the week after she attacked him in that elevator."
Response:Mad because Solange left Roc? Man, please. Branch out and do what, try to sell those double-soled Puma's she's the spokewoman for?
For all of the credit she gets as being the more creative Knowles sister, Solange's music catalog has never been heralded for having hits. Mad Jay laughs for that one.
US Weekly points the finger at the row involving Jay and Rachel Roy's relationship plus Solange yelling at Ray, Dame Dash's ex-wife.
"It looks like Solange Knowles' elevator attack on Jay Z was not her first altercation on the night of the Met Gala last Monday, May 5. A source tells Us Weekly that Beyonce's younger sister had yelled at designer Rachel Roy earlier at the after party, which was held at the Boom Boom Room in the Standard Hotel.
"The source added that, during the disagreement, Beyonce 'got in the middle of it,' though it remains unclear what it was about. According to another insider, Solange was yelling at a number of people; Roy, it turns out, was included in that group."
Response: Now, I'm being led to believe that Jay got pissed at Solange for going at Rachel Roy, the former wife of his former business partner who Jay's had little to do with over the past several years? And, we're throwing Beyonce, the same woman who backed way into the corner of the elevator during it all, was gettin' buck with Solange, too?
Hollywood Life, again, but this time they assert that Jay's controlling nature led to the skirmish.
"Solange Knowles didn’t hold back her emotions when she went after Jay Z in the elevator after attending a post-Met Ball party at the Standard Hotel with the rapper and her sister, Beyonce. But it turns out Solange attacked Jay because she believed that she was coming to her big sister’s defense, a source tells HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY.
“'Solange doesn’t like the way Jay Z controls Beyonce. Beyonce would never speak up to him or defend herself, so Solange does it. Solange is not afraid of him and is fed up with him calling all the shots in Beyonce’s life,' an insider tells HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY."
Response:The fact that they used "EXCLUSIVELY" twice as if that gave credibility to their story automatically makes their story suspect.