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2.20 The Cooler

On Stepping Out On Faith And Cody ChesnuTT’s “Love Is More Than A Wedding Day”

By J. Tinsley / 02.19.14

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The reality of the unknown is intoxicating. Scary, too, but more so intoxicating. Some run from it, others run to it. As for myself? I don’t know. Maybe it’s both.

Since last May, life’s been one big risk and plunge into the unknown. My job had layoffs. I took a trip overseas. I collected unemployment. I’ve gotten paid for pieces I’ve written that have helped pay bills probably more than any editor cares to realize. And here I am, in February 2014, back overseas.

Having been here since the day after the Super Bowl, I’ve become accustomed to life in Dubai. I’m here on a risk, a chance of a lifetime in some regard. And it’s inspired by the one person (not named my mom or grandma) who’s been with me every step of the way.

The time has been spent writing, job interviews and – as is the case whenever you visit this side of the world – a bit of mind-clearing relaxation activities. The malls are top-notch, the food is unreal and the weather raises no higher than 70 each day. For the right opportunity, too, calling this place home for the next two or three years isn’t out of the question either.

I adapt to surroundings quick (or at least I like to believe I do). My girlfriend, who lives here, and I have used the trip to not only enjoy each other’s company, but learn about ourselves. Learn about each other, really.

God knows I’m several things, but a relationship expert will never be written on my tombstone. What makes her tick, what makes me tick, what she appreciates, what I appreciate, well, that’s stuff we’re learning more as the hours add up and days pass by. She’s made me a better person and I like to believe I’ve had some sort of positive impact on her as well.

Perhaps that’s what the true identity of a relationship is – a never-ending voyage in understanding an equation with no true concert answer: ourselves. Love is a crazy emotion, man. Two years ago, I was the guy who’d laugh at friends at the bar willing to go to the ends of the Earth to make a relationship work with a young lady they believed was preordained for them.

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Now, here I am, the guy I was laughing at while downing shots of whatever the bartender pegged on the house.

And I’m fine what that. I love it, actually. The truth is, I don’t know what’s going to happen these last few days here. Not with pitches to publications I’d like to write for. Not with job hunt. Not with her. Not with us.

We both agree marriage isn’t the route for the close future. We’re still selfish, which isn’t a bad thing in some cases. We’re not Ossie Davis and Ruby Dee (yet, at least). But the one lesson I’ve taken from whatever love is, is that it never comes with its own playbook. Damn-near everything happens on the fly because in its most natural state love’s supposed to be spontaneous. It’s supposed to make you see your soul because that’s what it requires you to extend to make anything worth working…work.

Too often, people become drunk in the Hollywood aspect of love. The fancy dinners, the big weddings, the birth of children where the mother doesn’t crack a sweat in the delivery room. All that stuff.

Much like Cody ChestnuTT’s “Love Is More Than A Wedding Day” suggests, it’s everything before and after saying “I do” that goes into making something between two people work and, most importantly, employ longevity. It’s pissing her off at three in the morning making cheese eggs. It’s laughing while randomly quoting Step Brothers waiting on the train. It’s…hell…hell if I know.

It’s the stuff that doesn’t sound appealing in a radio-catered love song or read well in a fabricated, cheaply introspective Instagram caption. Cody sang about it. I’m neck-deep involved in such.

The world needs more feel-good music. If for no other reason than serving as a reminder despite the intoxicating scent of the unknown in life, at least a soundtrack exists.

Bonus: Those looking to catch ChesnuTT live, check out the dates below for his B Sides And Remixes Tour.

3/12 – New Orleans, LA – Tipitina’s
3/13 – Austin, TX- Clive’s Bar
3/15 – Austin, TX- Hotel San Jose
3/15 – Austin, TX- Holy Mountain Backyard
3/17 – Houston, TX – The Studio at Warehouse Live
3/19 – Denver, CO – Hi-Dive
3/20 – Durango, CO @ Community Concert Hall at FLC
3/22 – Park City, UT @ Canyons Resort Spring Grüv
3/23 – Boise, ID @ Treefort Music Fest
3/26 – Walla Walla, WA – Main Street Studios
3/27 – Yakima, WA – Seasons Performance Hall
3/30 – West Hollywood, CA – The Troubador
4/26 – Durham, NC @ The Art of Cool Music Fest


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