Well, it certainly wasn’t supposed to play out like this in Group C. Slovenia leads, England looks the worst, and the U.S. could actually come out tops.

For the boys in red, white, and blue, it’s all very simple: win and they’re in. After needing a miracle to pull out the tie against England, only to have luck (and a ref with an ax to grind) work against them in the match against Slovenia, their destiny, it seems, is finally in their own hands in a more than manageable match against Algeria. Defend well out wide against the likes of Belhadj and Ziani and that should negate Algeria’s attacking threat, Donovan & Co. should provide the sufficient firepower.

As for England, they, too, can decide their own World Cup fate in Group C’s other match. However, their utter incompetence up to this point suggests that a win won’t be on the cards. Cries for an over-the-hill Joe Cole to come in the lineup and play savior highlight the extent to which England has lost its way. Luckily, it’s only Slovenia they face. So, the Loyalists should also join the Patriots in breathing a sigh of relief today.

Assorted Recap

The folly of the French comes to an end — The “hand of god” got them in the tourney. And then the other hand bitchslapped Marianne. The coach sucked. The team quit on him. And then they lost to South Africa.

The Vuvuzelas bzzzzz their last bzzzzzz — One would hope, given Bafana Bafana’s elimination yesterday. But as the drunken plaything of choice, the South African invention seems to have caught on with the supporters from all of the other countries. Buy one here.

Ronaldo x Homer x Nike — Portugal notches seven goals against North Korea, Cristiano Ronaldo breaks his World Cup duck with a fortunate effort and Nike seemingly commemorates the occasion with the a collab with The Simpsons, stemming from the excellent “Write The Future” campaign. Available here.