pacman-jones

I’m done. No, for real this time, I’m done.

Normally, I don’t get overly emotional when crafting posts, but I can’t stand people who don’t appreciate an opportunity when it is given. Adam “Pacman” Jones happens to be one of those people. After the strip club incident hit the fan, I was all for giving dude a second chance. Even when he completely bombed during his brief tenure with my Dallas Cowboys, I still thought Jones could garner another chance to get back in the NFL. But after this f*ck up, his well has now officially run dry. I’m sure most of you heard about this by now, but if you haven’t, here’s the skinny.

Pacman was reportedly going to play in the CFL for the Winnipeg Blue Bombers this year and, barring any behavior problems, he could sign with any team in the NFL. However, like Stephon Marbury before him, Jones basically played his own career funeral via UStream. Instead of me attempting to explain it, let Paul Friesen give the play-by-play.

If there was a theme to his video — and the thing was so disjointed you couldn’t help but wonder if the guy was actually jointed, if you know what I mean — it was that Jones was going to cash his Winnipeg cheques and get out of Dodge faster than a Cadillac XLR on nitro.

“I’ve got a clause in my contract, when I get a call from an NFL team I can go over,” he said. “I actually got two calls today, so if they tell me tomorrow that Pacman’s back, that’d be a bummer for all my Winnipeg fans.”

The video, which streamed live Tuesday evening and was readily available on the web yesterday — how’d you enjoy it, Lyle Bauer? — began with Jones saying he’d signed to play in the new UFL.

“Go to the UFL and do my thing and get ready for a playoff run in the NFL, you know what I’m sayin’?”

“That’s when someone called Jones, live, and presumably told him what league he was really going to.

“Pain is only temporary,” Jones said. “Besides, I’m only gonna be there for eight weeks… or shorter.”

That’s right, Adam, brag about being able to leave whenever you want. I’m sure that would have went over well. Unfortunately, the show didn’t stop here.

For 44 minutes, Jones came across as a complete imbecile, bragging about his luxurious home and getting his girlfriend to show off her engagement ring: “Y’all know what 41/2 karats look like in one stone? Paid for!”

So yeah, if you were ever wondering how to stick your foot in your own mouth, Pacman provides you with a fool-proof step-by-step booklet. Moments after this train wreck concluded, the Blue Bombers recended their offer to Jones and now he’s back to square one. Or as my grandmother would say, ‘up the creek without a paddle.’ Somewhere though, you have to believe Michael Vick read this story and uttered the words, “N*gga, are you f*ckin’ crazy?” Nah, just stupid.

At the very least, I guess I could be thankful he didn’t eat Vaseline.

Video Kills Pacman [Winnipeg Sun]

Previously Posted — Pac Man Jones & The $100,000 Mistake | Stephon Marbury Wants You To Know He Smokes Weed