I was fortunate to have a rare Friday off from work, so after lunch at Genji’s and a few hours roaming a barren wasteland Circuit City I was tuckered out. So when I got home I was flipping through the channels and got sucked in by the trifecta of The Jaime Foxx Show, The Wayans Bros, & Smart Guy on BET. 106 & Park came on & I said fuck it, maybe something good will happen, but then I remembered Friday The 13th was next week. I watched any way.  So in honor of the Grammy’s, they awarded The Parky’s, just some bullshit they made up to anoint accolades to the Top 10 list.

Well, two can play that game so without further ado TSS Presents the 1st Annual (maybe only) TWTW Smokies.

And The Smokies go to…
Lily Allen: For Best Halloween Costume Worn In The Middle Of Winter.

Michael Phelps: For Best Training Regimen This Side Of Balco.

Kid CuDi: For Best Repositioning Of Your Public Perception In 15 Minutes.

Cam’ron: For Most Puzzling & Unexpected Re-emergence.

Mythblazers: For Continual Efforts In Answering Questions… So We Don’t Have To.

Vibe: For Dispelling Bankruptcy Myths By Putting A Crack Head On The Cover (We Love You Frankie!)

B-Real: For Putting The Smoke In Smoking Session.

Vivica A. Fox: For Sadly Introducing Me To LOGO.

Christian Bale: For Going Muthafucking Nuts On That Ass.

Contra™: For Still Having No Idea Why He’s Always Getting Pulled Over.

Lil’ Wayne & Katie Couric: For Best. First. Date. Ever.

Miss Info: For Being A TSS Wifey Fantasy Draft All-Star.

The Goonies: For Keeping Their Bosses Hands Clean… And Loving Every Minute Of It.

Killer Mike & GTO: For The OMG Lifetime Achievement Award. Grind Time Rap Gang. Bang! Bang! Bang!

Bawse Rawse & Curtis: For Manufacturing Beef To Promote Albums That Will Probably Be Pushed Back At Least One More Time.