Before Soulja Boy and Hurricane Chris, there was J-Kwon. You may remember the then-underaged knucklehead for his drunken smash “Tipsy” and debut album’s title track “Hood Hop,” whose monstrous instrumental was made popular by everybody except for him. Seemingly out of nowhere, he’s back with the sequel Hood Hop 2 to catch the people up on his “get money” capers and Crip-affiliations.

To say J-Kwon is a terrible rapper would be a bit unfair. His sleepy vocals manage to hold up thanks in part to a controlled delivery. The primary problem here is the lyrics. Hood Hop 2 is back-of-the-Buick, weed scented rider music but lyrical gaffes like “I don’t work for Steak ‘n Shake®/but I can make his patty melt” on the otherwise stellar “Jockin,” run rampant throughout and dominate the tone of the album. For when J-Kwon claims his place as “Rapper of the Year” and proceeds to state “the game without me/is like a crackhead in detox,” heads will question if that’s actually a bad thing.

The upside to the debacle is Hood Hop 2 is roughly 40 minutes long and 11 tracks deep opposed to being a long-winded gangsta party that fizzles halfway through. The choruses may need work but songs like “I Told You” and “Money” teeters on the lines of passable. Every track also utilizes low budget bass chasms and sparse piano bars that work for J-Kwon, but drag otherwise.

If it wasn’t for the enhanced studio quality of Hood Hop 2, it would be indistinguishable from any other Myspace newjack detailing the one mile radius of their neighborhood. With no apparent single or guest stars to boast, J-Kwon’s putting on for the locals and ironically, that’s a success in his book.

2 CIGARETTES