The Goonies
EDUTAINMENT By TSSCrew on February 6, 2009 at 2:24 pm
Words by Khalid Strickland
In the wacky world of Hip-Hop some artists are known more for scrappin’ than for rappin’. These predators rarely drop albums — music taking a backseat to their aggressive antics — but they make the rap game a lot more colorful by keeping the pretenders in check. With their genuine street credibility, prison-yard tactics and itchy trigger-fingers, the Goonies of Hip-Hop have created an entertaining niche in the genre. Here are eight in particular who have already left their mark.
Alfamega
When you look up the word “goon” in the rap dictionary, you’ll find those now-infamous pictures of T.I.’s Grand Hustle muscle Alfamega spazzin’ out on Shawty Lo’s crew at last year’s Dirty Awards. In those photos, especially the one where he’s smiling as he tussles with an overmatched cop, you can tell that Alfamega was having a good time; he shrugged-off a blast of pepper spray to the face like it was spearmint Binaca. With a lead-fisted shot to the dome, Mega left a Shawty Lo associate snoozing on the floor during T.I. and Grand Hustle’s performance at the Awards show.
The televised incident may earn him another bid in the bing, but his commissary should be stacked for a job well done. Aspiring rappers take note: It doesn’t matter how well you rhyme, how many chicks you bag and how much jewelry you rock. Your crew isn’t complete without a ninja like Mega in the stable.
Trick Trick
What separates Detroit’s own Trick Trick from most of his contemporaries is that he actually put an album out (a decent one at that); an impressive feat for a professional goon. His latest LP, The Villain, is in stores now. But although the album features heavy-hitters like Ice Cube, Eminem and a posthumous appearance by D-12’s Proof, it’s a mere footnote in Trick Trick’s untouchable gangster resume. The first notable rapper he beat down was Miami’s Trick Daddy, who took offense to Trick Trick’s similar name. When Trick Daddy sauntered into the D for a performance like it was sweet, he was knuckled down severely. It’s also alleged that Trick Trick and his crew put the beats on Styles P of The Lox.
But it was the assault and robbery of rap music’s premiere whipping-boy Yung Berg that ushered Trick Trick into the upper echelon of Hip-Hop Goons. Trick has recently expressed a disdain for Soulja Boy and his negative effect on the Hip-Hop industry and even volunteered to teach the young’un a much-needed lesson at his own belt’s expense. After Soulja Boy’s idiotic “shout-out to the slave masters” at last year’s BET Awards, that lesson may be overdue.
Maino
Maino had a bona-fide hit single “Hi Hater” under his belt. But his volatile temper, ten year bid for kidnapping and penchant for laying the smack down has overshadowed his success thus far. Junior Mafia’s Lil’ Cease got his head stomped into the ground by Maino during a dust-up in Bed Stuy. Queensbridge rapper Tragedy Khadafi also felt Maino’s wrath after some music-industry business between them went sour. The result was a lopsided butt-whoopin’ doled out by Maino and his wolves at an industry party. Maino also laid “The Hand of God” on a disruptive fan during one of his concerts in Poughkeepsie.
But once again, it was a timely cameo from Yung Berg, a shoe-in for “Punching Bag Of the Year,” who brought Maino the most shine. After touring with him over the summer, Berg inexplicably stepped to the Brooklyn ex-con in an Atlanta nightclub, claiming that Maino was talking reckless about him. Once Maino slapped earth, wind and fire out of him, Berg actually apologized and blamed the “reasons” on the aaa-al-al-aa-alcohol. Imagine somebody apologizing for getting slapped. Maino later explained that because he sincerely likes Yung Berg and was solely out to discipline him. He added that he only gave Berg a slap and noted that it could’ve been much worse. Feel free to laugh out loud.
Tru Life
Jay-Z is a smart guy. Rather than get his diamonds dirty brawling with foes in the streets, he has a group of underlings to handle such menial tasks. An example of this muscle is Tru Life from the Lower East Side of Manhattan; a dude who can actually rhyme. He was signed to Jay-Z’s Roc La Familia record label, a connection that seemed to have promise, but in hindsight seems like a tactical move by the clever Hov. Tru has yet to drop an album but he’s known for acts of vintage goonery. According to several snitches (excuse me, I mean witnesses), it was Tru Life who snuffed Cam’ron, one of Hov’s staunchest haters, in front of a NYC club.
But wait… there’s more. Tru had a well-known dispute with Prodigy of Mobb Deep some time ago. Documented on the Beef DVD, Mr. Life retold how he and his crew armed themselves to the teeth, ambushed some of Mobb’s crew at a recording studio in NYC and robbed them. He may never drop an LP, but Tru Life has solidified his legacy in the prestigious Hall of Hip-Hop Goons.
40 Glocc
While yet to make a hit record, but somehow 40 Glocc from Colton, California stays in the rap tabloids. A veteran Crip with a mega-heavy rep, 40 Glocc took exception to Lil’ Wayne’s counterfeit affiliation with the Bloods. So Mr. Glocc robbed Tyga, a teenybopper artist signed to Lil’ Wayne’s Young Money record label. 40 Glocc then paraded around with Tyga’s stolen, diamond-encrusted Young Money pendant. This was no real conquest since the rail-thin Tyga, cousin of Gym Class Heroes front man Travis McCoy, is soft as baby shit. But when Lil’ Wayne and his entourage foolishly rolled through Colton in a caravan of luxury vehicles, 40 Glocc and his drones stepped it up a notch. A horde of thirsty Crips surrounded the immobile caravan and began taunting Wayne, who remained hidden in his tinted-out (and presumably bulletproof) SUV.
40 Glocc led the charge, as he called Weezy out for being a fake Blood, Glocc slapped the SUV’s windows and demanded Wayne confront him man-to-man. That didn’t happen, of course. Face it, Wayne is a decent recording artist, but as a goon he isn’t in 40 Glocc’s league. The intense moment was captured on video and uploaded to the modern-day thug’s arena of choice — YouTube — for the world enjoy.
Uncle Murda
Like most Hip-Hop Goons, East New York’s Uncle Murda has dropped a slew of requisite mixtapes and has made the internet rounds, selling his street cred with the fervor of a presidential candidate. He was Jay-Z’s muscle at Roc-A-Fella and now he’s rumored to be signing with G-Unit to join the rent-a-thug ranks of Spider Loc and 40 Glocc. But Uncle Murda seems comfortable with his enforcer status and the man is downright entertaining. In a move of pure marketing genius (or foolishness, depending on your point-of-view,) he announced on citywide radio that he’s caught numerous bodies and even shot cops, inciting angry police officers to call up the station in protest. Murda was also filmed sucker-punching his longtime nemesis and fellow Brooklynite, Papoose.
After a bullet grazed his skull earlier this year, Murda posted a YouTube clip claiming that he nursed his wounds with “Kush and Hennessy.” Hopefully, the Kush was prescribed by a licensed physician.
Tony Yayo
Tony Yayo has dropped platinum albums, appeared on a number of G-Unit projects and has multi-millionaire 50 Cent for a best friend, so when it comes to being categorized as a Hip-Hop goon, he’s in a class by himself. His music is average at best, but the man’s thugged-out resume is impeccable. Jail time, gunplay, beatings, intimidation…it’s stellar. As for notable incidents, where do we begin? Jimmy Henchman, The Game’s one-time manager and sworn enemy of G-Unit, accused Tony Yayo and his cronies of slapping his teenage son (charges against Yayo were dropped when one of his minions admitted to the act).
When it comes to talking trash and provoking 50 Cent’s opponents, nobody does it like Yayo. Whether questioning Game’s sexuality, calling ex-associate Young Buck broke or charging that Ghostface didn’t write Supreme Clientele, Tony Yayo doesn’t bite his tongue. And the dude’s loyal too. Catch Yayo on 50 Cent’s new MTV reality-show, “The Money And The Power,” standing beside his boss, rocking a crispy tuxedo. He’s graduated up to Corporate Goon.
Hip-Hop Goon Emeritus: Just-Ice
An affiliate of Boogie Down Productions during their heyday, Fort Greene, Brooklyn gangster rapper Just-Ice (emphasis on “gangster”) is the granddaddy of Hip-Hop Goons. Plus, he made some classic songs to boot (“Latoya,” “Going Way Back”). No disrespect to Plies and his sophomore album’s title, but Just-Ice is truly “The Definition of Real.”
When KRS-One had beef with MC Shan after KRS’s classic 1987 diss record, “South Bronx,” it was a lone Just-Ice who allegedly visited Shan’s Queensbridge Projects with a shotgun in tow, looking for challengers. Unsurprisingly he found none. Just-Ice’s street cred is rock-solid and with an appearance on America’s Most Wanted under his belt, the man is due for a Lifetime Achievement award in the art of Goonery.
Posted in EDUTAINMENT, GENERAL, SMOKE BREAK — Tags: 40 Glocc, Alfamega, beefs, Just-Ice, Maino, Tony Yayo, Trick Trick, Tru Life, Uncle Murda
58 Comments
Rocky….RoOOOaaaAADDD
could Suge be considered for this list?
hahaha great post
And where may I ask is Mr Bumpy Knuckles himself, Freddie Fox!??
Mans got fists like garbage cans
Freddie & perhaps Ghost will make the next list’s inductees. Minus Just, this was strictly the no talent-having frumps that parade as rappers.
Although he’s released quite a few records, would Z-Ro be an honorable mention? Trae?
Good to see Just Ice getting his props for his goonery.
^^^ makes sense…
“Minus Just, this was strictly the no talent-having frumps that parade as rappers.”
^ “I take seven MC’s put em in a line…” © The R
shots fired! lol
LMAO @ this whole list. Classic TSS right here.
Digg.
good stuff.
I would also nominate Willie D. of Geto Boys fame as a talent-having goon.
Mega?
This shit is funny as hell. Good work as usual. Freddie Foxx definitely needs to be on that list, he’s in the hall of fame for sure. Plies needs to read this, he always talking about goon shit these are the real goons right here.
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naw u cant include Suge cuz he just mimickin J. Prince
yea yall should do a list on real rappers who do their own goonin
the game been known to clean clocks..gucci mane is the only rapper wit a certified kill..Trae does his own shit. dem bay cats do their own dirtywork too(Mac Minister n dem)..shit T.I tried to do his shit too
so who do you think would win a a goon free for all match? i would say foxxx or maino
This is defintely a classic post. The originality and writing are worthy of XXL or any popular rap mag.
Props KStrick.
Uncle Murda is a piece of work, and i hope he goes to hell for claiming bodies on air. Fuck him.
Funny/good stuff right here.
“With their genuine street credibility….”
^
Hmmmm… I wonder if this RAWSE/50 stuff influenced this post?
Glad to see Just Ice made the list for the youngins who might not have known, but Freddie Foxxx not making the cut before a cat like Tru Life??? I mean, I heard saying Bumpy Knuckles in the mirror 3 times could get your nose ripped off lol
good read
hopefully mega wont get LAWKED UP NIGGA
“Trick has recently expressed a disdain for Soulja Boy and his negative effect on the Hip-Hop industry”
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this was expressed as he sat cleaning off Young Berg…. Excuse me….. HIS Transformer chain.
Best part is the look on Meg’s face.
“Yippee! I’m going to jail AND i get to punch a cop! Thank you Jesus!”
Good shit. Honorable mention: The Boss of the Chi-Town GOONS, Bump J.
Freddie Foxxx is gonna whup my ass for not including him on this list.
I’d better lay low for a while.
Can my man Siegel get a honorable mention???
Erase this post and put Freddie Foxx on that shit. I’m gonna go punch someone in his honor. Probably a small child.
This is Hilarious and sad at the same time, and what about Shyne
Didn’t Tru Life and company only rob producer L.E.S. and his crew??? I remember that BEEF dvd; Hav and P were laughing at Tru Life. Plus, I read in an interview with Tragedy Khadafi that he didn’t get snuffed, Maino’s crew just tussled with him. If you wan to talk about goons let’s talk about Nas’s homies the BraveHearts!!!
dz5000 Says:
so who do you think would win a a goon free for all match? i would say foxxx or maino
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i gotta go with alfamega…dude is a super goon
Willie D of Geto Boys has put in his share of goonery as well. Surprised Jay-Z’s homie didn’t get an honorable mention for macing Kellz, and Ransom’s homie that slapped the ish out of one of Budden’s weedmen.
It’s always better when the actual rappers do the goonage.
This post is missing some Big Lurch. If gettin’ leaked out and chewing through your girlfriend’s chest ain’t goonery, I don’t know what is.
I knew Just-Ice had to be on this list. U didnt mention how he caught a body down in Washington, D.C,’s Howard U. A body!!!
^^^
I searched nite & day for the America’s Most Wanted footage but since it never went to court, I’m pretty sure it got destroyed to avoid defamation.
Honorable mention: The Boss of the Chi-Town GOONS, Bump J.
Kanye could of saved him but no… too busy lockin down love
Whats funnier… the video of wayne gettin pussified or the ads for lil wayne ringtones when you watch the video on youtube
Classic Post
500k flea Says:
Didn’t Tru Life and company only rob producer L.E.S. and his crew??? I remember that BEEF dvd; Hav and P were laughing at Tru Life. Plus, I read in an interview with Tragedy Khadafi that he didn’t get snuffed, Maino’s crew just tussled with him. If you wan to talk about goons let’s talk about Nas’s homies the BraveHearts!!!
Feb 06, 2009, 7:41 pm
^^^
YO WAT THE FUCK R U TALKIN ABOUT??WAT BEEF VIDEO WERE U WATCHIN SON??THEM MOBB SLEEP BITCHES DIDNT EVEN WANNA TALK ABOUT IT CUZ THEY KNEW IF THEY SED ANYTHING TRU AND DEM GANGSTA ASS RICANS WILL BE BACK WIT THEM SHOTTIES TO THEY FACE NIGGA…KEEP THINKIN DEM LIGHT SKIN NIGGAS WONT RUN UP ON COWARDS LIKE U N SHANK U UP LIKE A LIGHT SKINNED NIGGA DID LARRY DAVIS…LATINOS STAND UP,I FUX WIT MY BLACK NIGGAS BUT YA NEEDA STOP THINKIN THE LIGHT SKIN HOMIES AINT GOONED OUT TOO…SHOUT 2 TRU LIFE…CHEAA BEA BEAA…BOOGIE DOWN TO L.E.S….
AND PLEASE DONT ACT LIKE TRU DIDNT SINGLE HANDEDLY DISMANTLE THE BITCHSET AKAP DIPSHITS…IM OUT…100
@ Chino: Calm the fuck down there Scarface, quit e-muggin’ & e-thuggin’. I didn’t say that Latino’s were pussy, I just stated what I saw. Also, if you remembered (but I’m sure that you don’t) Tru life apologized to his fans ON DVD for his reckless behaviour. You want proof??? Gimme your mailing address and I’ll send you a copy. Cowards like me??? Ninja please, like I’m scared of some clown such as your self who types in ALL CAPS. Sit down fuck-boy.
I searched nite & day for the America’s Most Wanted footage but since it never went to court, I’m pretty sure it got destroyed to avoid defamation.
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Same I couldn’t find ANYTHING on it but I remember it distinctly.
THEM MOBB SLEEP BITCHES DIDNT EVEN WANNA TALK ABOUT IT
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True.
This post is missing some Big Lurch. If gettin’ leaked out and chewing through your girlfriend’s chest ain’t goonery, I don’t know what is.
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He was on PCP, right?
One of the most entertaining reads I’ve had in a long time…cracking up at work. And by the way, word around ATL had it that the dude Alfamega knocked out cold, face flat on the floor was actually Shawty Lo’s brother…`
I believe Just Ice’s goonery is the reason they put bullet-proof glass in the reception area of Unqiue studios too. Did you ever hear that story, CJ?
Just-ice did some incredibly ill things. From going on the road, stealing his whole hotel room to just running up in his label and robbing the promo staff, dude is official
there are a lot more then that
tony yayo lmao, plz.
wheres styles at?
wheres beanie sigel at?
and about that mobb deep and tru life beef, there was more to the story. tru lifes camp got camp got handles later on by those infamous niggas.
lmao my bad on da spelling
HELL YEAH BIG LURCH…NOW THAT NIGGA WAS JUST DUMMY…
Quiet as its kept but Eric B (yes) is a well known industry thug.
Witty and well written.
Maino gets it in musically though.
i was looking for freddie fox, ghost and beans at first but i see what you did there, this is funny as hell.
oh my goodness this was very great and detailed….. wow i remember all those…….even just ice!!!! yes i’m that old lol
This list= wrong to death (no pun), but funny as hell.
Goons abound!
Great post
gucci can be on da list
This Needs more Wu. The Killah Beez ain’t just rappers. I think you HAVE to put in work to get down with the team.
as said before, Bumpy needs to be added.
Also Lakey the stick up Kid, QB rapper full time goon.
Lakey was Nas’ goon circa 1999 – 2004
do the history you’ll see
TRU MUTHAFUKIN LIFE!!!! THIS NI99A IS NOT THE DUDE TO PLAY WIT. HE HAD MOBB DEEP SCARED. HE ALSO PUT DIPSET IN THIER PLACE.
YO wat about Saigon he should be right next to tru life, he backs his shit up
all that sounds good, but every mother fucka up there respect the big homies m.o.p, the mother fuckin mash out posse, brooklyn in this bitch
why is maino shinin as a goon that niggas a clown he picks on the weak he did not fuck up trag he tryed to jump trag and failed trag been layin the smack down and extortin niggas for a long time maino is one of them vics that got caught…
uncle murda str8 pussy i cant name how many times i seen that nigga get sonned …charlie hustle sonned the shit outta him in the club one night i was there with charlie i seen it
tru life is only gangsta when the g.i goons is around and he did snuff cam right in the nose i was there i seen it big joe was askin cam if he wanna fight cam said nah then the cops popped up do not get it twist tho there is some wild wild goons on that dipset team go ask tru life about that crazy beatin he caught that remains under wraps till this day lol yea but u noticed how quiet son got ..that was after that dipset beatin true story
wheres fat joes name son been thuggin it for years and use to stick mad niggas up in the early 90s ts had the most goons in one squad i eva seen all 25 to life rat hunters ready to bang niggas sleep on joe cuz of 50 cent beef niggas is stupid
so many names that shoulda been named and niggas pick maino and uncle murda 2 smack dvd thugs
good post. I liked it.
I still want to know EXACTLY what happened with the whole Tru Life robbery situation with Muggs cuz its unclear what happened even with the story being told on Beef.
This list is excluding the top goon.
His name is Marc Goone. Check him out. A new upcoming hip hop artist