Intro By Jesse H.
We all have that select playlist that we know is better listened to in the privacy of our own headphones. Those select cuts that we love, but we wouldn’t dare throw on at a party for fear of the crowd carrying you away and burning you at the stake. Well, we’ve decided to pull back the curtain, swallow our pride and let you all in on a few of those tracks that we’d rather you’d not know we bump in a little segment we’d like to call the “Hate That I Love You” playlist.
Sure, it’s overdone. And sure, it usually masks suspect – at best – singing ability. But damn if I don’t fuck with T-Pain, Akon, ‘Ye, and Weezy on the regular. Shit, even Papoose vocoder songs get regular burn on my iPod. And you know what? I’m only about 2/3 ashamed of it.
Polaris – “Hey Sandy” — Holy shit did I love Nickelodeon when I was a kid. The Adventures of Pete and Pete especially. That’s why I keep the theme to it on hand, to remind me of when I was a brat. However, if a homeboy strolls up to check on what I’ve got in rotation I’ll quickly answer with a failsafe “Wu-Tang!” Then quickly crawl back to Thursday afternoon, 1994 with a bag of Ruffles and some red Hi-C drank.
Janet Jackson – “Escapade” — It’s not so much that I hope someone doesn’t take a gander at my Ipod screen for this one, it’s more like I hope someone doesn’t roll up on my ride while I’m belting this one out at the stoplight. Thank you baby Jesus for tinted windows.
Madonna – “Like A Prayer” (7″ Remix) — Even though this song is as old as I am, I’ve just recently played it out. Credit the pure soul elicited by Madge and her gospel sisters, along with the extended and uplifting Patrick Leonard production on the remix. A pop song with this much soul is rare, especially by a white chick.
Donna Summer – “Bad Girls” — Like the Madonna joint, I shouldn’t be afraid to blast classic joints like this out the stocks…but I am. Aside from the fact Miss Summer is singing about being a prostitute, I’m not doing myself any favors by signing along, especially to the ‘Toot Toot, Beep Beep’ refrain. But, like The Outsiders, that damn disco riff is just too sweet to resist.
A Flock of Seagulls – “Space Age Love Song” — I don’t know what it is about it. Maybe the spacey production, the simple, universal theme of lost teenage romance, the laser blasts, or when the guitar goes up an octave, but this song makes me want to well up on some sentimental 80’s teen movie type shit.
Common – “New Wave” — The way critics talked about Electric Circus, it was as if you bought or liked the album, that you were contributing to the slaughter of innocent puppies. I actually enjoyed several cuts, especially this one, with its dark synths, kooky chorus and unconventional arrangement. Just don’t tell any of the Crew.
Britney Spears – “Womanizer” — I objectify men, I’m sexist, I call everyone “bitches,” I like to wear sparkley shit and will head to any dance floor with my Kettle 1 Cosmo raised high. I’m also so willing to give Britney the benefit of the doubt I’m really just one penis away from being Perez Hilton. Consider this my vapid Hollywood anthem.
Nat King Cole – “The Christmas Song” — Great song. No embarrassment here. Unless…you listen to this shit year round like I do.
Mika – “Love Today” — An extremely suspect UK pop artist singing falsetto about hookers and promiscuous women is not exactly what I would play in front of my boys on a Saturday night, but when I’m in a bad mood the shit lifts my spirits like no gangster rapper ever could.
Eddie Murphy – “Party All The Time” — Yes, this is the man who did Dreamgirls. But there’s nothing like Eddie Murphy in the studio with an orange-haired Rick James to bring back the warm and fuzzy feelings of his Beverly Hills Cop days. I see you dancing, 80′s babies.
George Michael- “Freedom” — Fuck being ashamed, I love this song.
Color Me Badd – “I Wanna Sex You Up” — This has been my jumpoff since 2nd grade. It gets additional cool points for it’s appearance on Neil Armstrong’s classic Sweeet tape.
Timbaland – “Peepin’ My Style” — Sometimes lyrics can be so bad that they make the song great, and by great I mean hilarious. For instance, Timbo dropped gems all over the track like “I don’t mean to brag, I don’t mean to boast/But I got to get me some of that good french toast…” At least the beat is good.
Hall & Oates – “I Can’t Go For That” — Looking at it under today’s context it could be considered THE anti-simpin’ anthem of 1981. This song is also De La Soul approved.
Plies Feat. Ne-Yo – Bust It Baby Part 2 — I don’t like Plies as much as some people (whatup Gotty haha) but Ced and LC know that I am quite found of that bussit babay.
Lil’ Wayne & Drake – “I Can Take Your Girl” — Auto-tuned Weezy. No, I’m not talking about that faux-rap in-between “Swagger Like Us” Weezy on auto-tune. I’m talking straight up crooning, slow jam melodious ass Lil’ Wayne. I roll up the windows and sing in that screechingly annoying voice like it’s fly. Warning: do not try at home if trying to set the mood with the lady.
Neil Diamond – “Sweet Caroline” — Man, I tried to boycott this song. For those that don’t know, this is Davidson’s theme song that they play during games. I made it a point to stand up with a fist in the air a la 1968 Olympics ever time. But when I was in Detroit watching us go to the Elite 8- “Good times never seemed so good! So Good! So Good!”