Words by Matthew Mundy

Every once in a while a rapper will come around that positively, absolutely, scares the shit out of me.

I’m sure all of you know what I’m talking about – the dude who looks as if he would literally rip someone’s head off in a fight, Sub-Zero fatality style, if they were angry enough (which he undoubtedly would be, because his heart pumps bone-crunching terror juice). For those taking notes, a common affliction of scary-ass rappers is the inability to ever, ever, ever make a crossover song for the ladies. Unless that lady is Snoop.

Alfa Mega is that rapper for me right now.

I first became acquainted with him on the best song off T.I. vs. T.I.P., “Hurt”, where he held his own with T.I. and Busta Rhymes as they traded vicious double-time threats over a thumping Danja beat. It was to be later, however, when I would truly make my acquaintance with Alfa Mega, in the video for ‘Hurt’. And it was positively frightening. The video itself is incredible – one of the old school bunch of guys making menacing gestures towards a camera while hanging out in a warehouse videos – and Alfa Mega loomed above everyone else, oozing pure menace. That said, however, it was pretty standard rap video browbeating.

And then I saw the video for “4 or 5 Ways.”

Dear Lord. Watch it and tell me the rapid-cut scenes where he’s wrapping up a body in plastic don’t chill you just a little bit.

And while we’re at it, anybody else want to throw out their favorite scary-ass rapper?